Jewel is 8 years old, and in the 2nd grade. She has been in school for 4 years, but she has never got to sit at the lunch table with her friends. She has always been ostracised due to her peanut allergy. Children have bullied her since day one. She is a strong girl, but it breaks my heart to know that she has to hold so much hurt inside at such an early age.
Jewel and her family live mere yards away from where I grew up. I was so proud for my grandchildren to get to go to the same school that I and my children went to. The school that my parents and grandparents went to. Eagle pride ran deep in our family. Notice that I said ran, not runs. I am so ashamed of the way that our beloved school is being ran. It is not safe for a child with food allergies, not despite their efforts, but due to their actions.
It breaks my heart that my daughter now has to drive my grandchildren to another school district for Jewel to be safe, but she does, and I admire the lengths she goes to to keep her children safe. I am not going to go very derp into either school situation right now, there will be another time and place for that, but I do want to discuss Jewel's lunch table experiences to date. I am excited to hear from her this afternoon to see how today went.
Today will be Jewel's first day to sit at the regular tables like a normal child! Of course she will still bring her own food, as always, but she gets to eat it like a normal child, sitting with her classmates!
That may not seem like a big deal to you, but to an 8 year old who has been pointed at, picked at and laughed at for sitting at the "baby table", it is a big deal. She was forced to sit at a small children's play table in the corner of the lunch room at her old school. Jewel is tall for her age, her legs would not even fit under the table, her thighs and knees pressed against the bottom of the table just to try to eat. Can you imagine the cruel sneers and jeers of the other children?
We were all thrilled when the new school nurse advised us that they realized how unhealthy it was for a young child to be left out in that way, that the new school had rules in place that would protect Jewel, while allowing her to be a normal child at school. It was thrilling. Finally, a nut free school who takes children's health seriously. They would be able to ride the bus to and from school from my house if we ever wanted to have a sleepover now, it was the promise of a new dawn in our lives. Then she was assigned her teacher. Then we found out no one knew who the bus driver was on our route. Weeks in there was still a substitute. No epi-pens allowed on bus. No riding the bus. No sitting with the children at lunch as promised. Her teacher made her sit at the Teacher's table. Mostly alone, even though she, and we, were assured this would not happen, it did. This is not the time or place to discuss the teacher issues for this year, but I will say that we talked to Jewel's allergist about it and it is not uncommon for teachers to be cruel to their special needs children. So sad. The allergist suggested Jewel talk to the school counselor about the bullying and the frustration she was feeling at school. She did and it has made the world of difference. I am so proud of Jewel's strength and persistence, and the follow through of the counselor.
The nurse and the counselor agree that Jewel needed to be sitting with the other children at lunch, not alone at another table. The teacher disagred. The compromise was that Jewel would have one friend sit with her at lunch. That happened a few times, then she had to start sitting alone again and when she brought it to the teacher's attention, she was shut down and dismissed in a hurtful manner, again and again. Once she was encouraged to see the counselor, she shared her frustration and disappointment with the lunch situation. The counselor agreed to tslk to the teacher, which she did, but no changes were made. Jewel went back to the counselor after every meal she ate alone this week. The counselor apologized to Jewel, but said she could not go talk to the teacher again, but would bring it up to the Principal. Apparently she did. Before the school day ended yesterday, the Principal called Candi, Jewel's mom, and said that she agreed with the nurse and the counselor and that they had all of the necessary measures in place to keep Jewel safe at the regular lunch table, and that beginning today, February 26, 2016, Jewel would eat at the regular table with the other kids!!!
This feels like such a win for Jewel. I know this may seem minor in the scheme of things to others, but to Jewel,mthis is a monumental step of being accepted as a normal child. A child who can eat lunch without being pointed at and laughed at. It is a great day, indeed!
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